My life has been a bit tumultuous lately – nothing extremely drastic, just a lot of continuous stress at work, deadlines with the course I am taking, and tons of running with the busy schedules of our lives.
I sat staring at my laptop screen for quite a while today, but I didn’t want to write about the things that “go wrong” yet again. I always worry, just a little, that when I write about those things that it could be interpreted as I am being ungrateful for my life and all the blessings which I have been given, when I feel quite the opposite actually. I worry that someone may misread my post as a plea for sympathy or, worse, attention. When I write about “those” types of days, weeks, or even months, my hope is that my readers will realize that it is an attempt to share my thoughts about these feelings, as a way of ‘venting’ so-to-speak, but also as a way for others to realize that if they have ever felt this way then they are not alone.
So I didn’t want to write about those not-so-great days which have occurred lately, but how do I get past what has been first and foremost on my mind as of late? I have always written what’s on my mind here and my readers have always seemed to appreciate and be able to connect with that. So, I will write about what’s on my mind, but I will also focus on the positive side of things: the anchors which have kept me afloat.
(image courtesy of Bing images)
I have had some stress in my life lately, but I am extremely grateful for my friends, colleagues, and my family for all the support which they have shown me. Things are not always easy in my profession. Some years we are faced with challenges that are beyond our realm of expertise and experience and we must learn how to cope and how to deal with them the best we can on a daily basis. Some days we feel stronger than others. It is on those not-so-strong days that we are held up by those who know us best. These are the ones that tell us what we are doing right, instead of pointing out (or agreeing with us about) what we are doing wrong. When we stumble and feel like we are about to fall, it is those people who reach out to us and offer us something to hold onto.
Sometimes I struggle to ask for help. I like to do things on my own for several reasons. One, I don’t like inconveniencing anyone or making them feel “badly” (also known as dragging them down), if I share my problems or concerns. Two, if things don’t work out I only have myself to disappoint or even to blame. Three, I don’t like people to worry about me or to think that I am not capable of handling things on my own.
Even writing these down I know how foolish they may sound when I put them into words. I know that we have been put on this earth to help one another and I know how much people who love you want to help. Sometimes, though, it’s hard to remember that and to accept help. I have realized how important it is to let someone listen, even if that’s all they can do. I am appreciative for all the listeners in my life. Some days just knowing that your voice is heard is enough.
Things are not always easy in the day-to-day of life as well. Some weeks I feel more like a train wreck than anything else. Even with the best of my intentions things go awry, people are disappointed, and things snowball out of hand. Schedules take over my life and there barely seems room to breathe, let alone anything else. Taking a step back and re-evaluating has proven helpful to me. Taking a “mental health” day is never a waste when it means that I can recognize that I need a break from the current stressors in my life. Allowing someone who offers to help to actually help is another way which I have found to lighten my load also. Sometimes it takes a while, but when I am able to recognize how and why people want to help, it’s much easier to accept the help they want to give. I am appreciative of all the helpers in my life. Some days getting a helping hand is enough to keep you going.
This post has been a bit all over the place, but thankfully none of my past English professors will read it (at least not to my knowledge). I guess what I have been trying to say is that sometimes stress and “life” gets us down, but we need to remember that there are people who want to listen and who want to help. There will be days where we become disappointed and hurt by those people who don’t seem willing to be there – those who seem to turn their backs on us when something better comes along. It is important to recognize that we do have those people who are willing to be constant anchors in our lives. We just need to remember to reach out to them.