The Elusive Chase of the Happy Medium

This week started off with a bang. Not a literal bang, but a real slap-in-your-face-how-did-I-mess-this-up kind of bang. Not a great way to start off a week : stressed, already overwhelmed, and running like a hamster in a wheel. I misunderstood a deadline date, forgot about a number of appointments and meetings I had scheduled, and when you add in a few additional responsibilities thrown at me on the side, you have one exasperated blogger! However, … taking a deep breath, looking outside of the little box I call my world, I realized that things could always be worse! And besides, what a great topic to blog on — the search in finding the happy medium.

I was confronted with the reality (yes, not just my perspective or my perception, but the harsh reality) that I do NOT have enough time. There are 24 hours in a day and I could really use 48. Seriously. I do not have enough time to do everything that needs to be done : housework, laundry, yard work, appointments, sports, etc. Plus, I work full-time and hold several volunteer positions. Don’t get me wrong, I am NOT complaining. I love my life, my jobs, my responsibilities, and my family. These things are what make my life precious to me. I try, I really do, to get it all done, but it’s never really and fully ever completely done. Just when I get that last basket of clean laundry put away I realize that I have another load in the dryer. Just when I think my house is clean for the week and schedules have been met, it gets dirty again and there is another round of appointments. So, back in my hamster wheel I go. I don’t have enough time to do everything I need to, let alone the things that I WANT to. Yes, busy people get things done, but overwhelmed people have a hard time accomplishing anything!

There are three kinds of people : extremists, minimalists, and those of us who are happy just in-between. Most of us strive to be the in-between type. But, how do we get there? How do we find the place where the happy medium exists in our lives and still stay sane? I suppose if we are extremists we could try to lean more toward the minimalist side. That might work. If we are minimalists, we could strive to be more extreme. But, really, that wouldn’t be who we truly are. Trying to be something you’re not, in my opinion, is recipe for disaster.

Friends, how do we find the happy medium? Is it really an elusive chase?

In my own life, I have tried hard, so very hard, to do it all, to get it all done, only to realize that I wasn’t doing anything well. Commitments suffered when I made time for all of the social adventures I was invited to. Friendships felt abandoned when I tried to focus on completing all of my responsibilities and commitments. Those people and things that meant the most to me ended up getting the least amount of my time. That’s just not right. I realized I was shortchanging myself and my loved ones by doing all that “had” to be done, leaving very little time to do what my heart and those who hold the places closest to my heart desired. I confided to a loved one, “It’s either too much or too little!”, and some days I don’t know which is which!

Let’s be honest. I don’t have the answer. I have no clue how to find the perfect happy medium. I am sorry to disappoint you, dear readers, but I really and truly don’t have the fool-proof solution…

BUT — here’s what I’m attempting :

I’m going to try to find a balance between the work that has to be done and the work that can wait. For every thing that I do because I have to do it, I am going to attempt to do one thing (however small it might be), that I want to. I’m going to prioritize and compromise as needed. I’m going to delegate the tasks that I can, and I will ask for help when I require it. I’m going to practise not biting off more than I can chew, and that it’s ok to say, “I’m sorry, I can’t” and even “No”. I am going to find at least one thing to laugh about the days that I find myself running in the endless, squeaky hamster wheel, because when I’m laughing, I’m enjoying life. I am going to strive to give the best of me to my loved ones, not just whatever is left at the end of the day. I am going to treasure and value each day and find the happy where I can. The happy will not elude me. I will create peace with my own happy – medium or otherwise.

Hello dear readers! Thanks again for all of your thoughtful feedback on It Is What It Is… Or Is It? I so enjoy reading all of your comments and the stories that you share.

One of the things which helped me find my happy this week was the blog Staying Positive In a Bad-Ass World, by my dear author friend, Sandy Bucholtz. Please give her a read.

Find your happy – you are wonderful! ~K~

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10 thoughts on “The Elusive Chase of the Happy Medium

  1. Well said Sandy… I to love this post more than I can even begin to say. Kim, I always knew you and I were a lot alike, but I just never really knew how much alike we REALLY are! I can totally relate to this blog with my whole being. Great job Kim, keep up the wonderful progress you are making 🙂 I truly believe you will find your “Happy Medium”. (and when you do find the answer, please share with someone who loves ya!) Wonderful words hon!! xo

  2. One saying that has stayed with me….”When I die..will anyone remember the car I drove, the cleanliness of my house or the promotion I got…Nope..but my friends will remember that I called them on the Anniversary of a loss…my kids will remember that I called in sick because their heart was broken….and my husband will remember that I made love to him even when there was laundry to do in the middle of a Saturday afternoon..OK..so the quote is a little off but you get the point. Muah Sweetheart…xoxox,Kel

  3. Wow, again Kim, I love reading your blogs, cause they are real, they are heartfelt, and meaningful. I feel like at some point or another some of us have been in these situation and will probably be there again, and when that NEXT time comes along your words will be there to guide us or give us perspective on the situation. I find some peace in knowing that I am not the only one in this great big world that has all these crazy moments, days or weeks, and if we do there is always light after. Sometimes making these mistakes just means we are human, with the biggest of hearts. What a fantastic blog, and I cannot wait till next week, sometimes I would think you know me and my life all to well. 🙂 I enjoy reading what you write it is my weekly ME time with a tea and your words. 🙂

    • Thank you so much, Vicki! I appreciate your feedback a great deal! I am glad you can relate to my blogs. There are many crazy moments in this life, but you’re very right, there is always light afterwards. Thanks for reading and for your thoughtful comments. I always appreciate them!
      xo

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